For those of you subscribed to The Catnip Corner, a sincere apology for the tardiness again of this week's issue. However, the Editor has assured us they've finally got the cause of the problem figured out! It seems when the roaming MoonCat reporters said they'd turn in their stories "tomorrow", they weren't talking about earth days...
MoonCats having spent most of their time on the Moon, have grown accustomed to the slower light/dark cycles that happen there. While that's great for catching a few extra catnaps, it's not great for getting articles submitted on time! The ChainStation scientists busted out their sundials and got to measuring. They've now created several conversion algorithms to align the various chronometers on ChainStation to the MoonCat Seasons.
The beakers are polished, the snack supplies refilled, and the lab coats are freshly pressed! The ChainStation Alpha scientists are back to work after a well-earned holiday break (what happens on New Vegas IV stays on New Vegas IV...), and while lots of their work is top-secret, we snuck this report out for you to get a glimpse about what they're excitedly working away at in the upcoming year.
As the Ethereans celebrate the close of another earthly orbit around the sun, the ChainStation Alpha historians prepared a summary chronicle commemorating the heroic explorations, creative discoveries, and award-winning meowing contest winners of 2024. Whether you're a newcomer, long-time resident, or somewhere in between, take a peek and celebrate with your fellow Ethereans.
There's been an Adoption Center available for MoonCats to find new owners even before the rescue rocket made its final trip up to ChainStation Alpha, but as the MoonCats explore the digital lifestyle, their curiosity led them to a way to find a new owner that involves getting wet? While terrestrial felines tend to avoid water, MoonCats seem to have no problem jumping into NFT pools on some of the alien planets found in their explorations of Deep Space. If you're looking for a new feline friend, you may want to try donning a swimming suit and taking a dip yourself!
Butter, milk, eggs, space tuna, ... bi-directional moebius oscillating reactor core?!? Your shopping list might not quite be as exciting as what MoonCat #222 has been trying to sneak in to overclock their flying saucer, but odds are you have met a few fine friends in your travels around ChainStation Alpha that would be great to showcase! All Ethereans (even those who aren't owners of a MoonCat yet themselves) can create User Lists and record them for posterity. Will you build a wishlist of MoonCats you hope to adopt someday, a guestlist to your next exclusive Feline-themed party, or leaderboard of who's attempted to best your top score in zero-gravity breakdancing? All are possible as a User List.
When cruising at the speed of light, you don't have time for calling out a full "Good Morning" to other travellers, so a brief "GM" will do. But even at only two letters long, we've been seeing more and more reports of missed messages (recipient was cat-napping). Also, as explorers venture further and further from ChainStation Alpha, being able to trust transmissions from back home as truly from friends is essential for keeping safe in Deep Space. Wouldn't it be grand if a list were kept of who said what, when, and it was entirely trustworthy to affirm that the message did really come from the indicated sender and not some nefarious cat-napper trying to make inquiries about your spacecraft's extended warranty? Fortunately, making lists of things comes quite naturally to blockchain natives.
MoonCats know each other on sight, while their Etherian friends struggle to distinguish closely colored MoonCat pals. Harnessing those innate identification instincts, the MoonCats devised a way for their Etherian owners to put a digital paw-print on their messages, keeping the spacewaves organized and verifiable.
As the test tubes continue to bubble, the algorithm crunchers continue to crunch, and sunbeam analysis continues to warm, discoveries great and small continue to be discovered by the Ethereans living on the ChainStation and researching the mysteries of their lovable, colorful, digital friends. Recently, MoonCat #7989 pulled off an impressive stunt recently, showing all ChainStation Alpha residents a new trick they learned: manifesting a thousand glittering reflections of themselves! Station scientists labeled it 'Fractionalization', while the MoonCats just call it 'sparkly!' Plus, a new record-keeper docked with the station, helping MoonCats find that most-elusive of digital treasures: their permanent name...
Chainstation Alpha is a large station. Even with over 25,000 MoonCats added to its population after the rescue, and both the Ethereans and MoonCats happily browsing the Boutique, enjoying fizzy refreshment, and taking part in various research and education experiences happening on the station hasn't made it over-crowded inside.
The latest advances that were made to fully materialize MoonCats onto the blockchain while still allowing them to interact with the Ethereans in the physical world have proved stable and energizing for the lovable furballs. While there's still a lot to explore on Chainstation Alpha, the MoonCats have also turned their gaze outward, beyond the deep expanses of space, to universes and multiverses beyond physically reach-able from Chainstation Alpha. As the scientists who have been studying the mysteries of Deep Space and discovering other denizens, technologies, and mysteries there, just observing them with the long-range scanners isn't enough to satisfy their curiosity!
What Chainstation Alpha needs is a transportation hub, to start visiting these remote locations! Now, a typical spaceport with rocket transports is all well and good for local excursions, but as the sphere of interest for these scientists have grown to include other multiverses (potentially with Chainstations of their own...?), they needed a transportation hub capable of guiding a ship navigating rifts in time and space itself! The mysterious lootprint plans unlocked hints of space-folding technology, and with that the scientists have created the means to open up Portals to alternate dimensions! Some of these portals can be physically travelled through, while some can be mentally traversed as a projection of ones-self, and others can simply be observed through.
At first the puddles of moon vomit were thought to be caused by a combination of expired space tuna and gleeful overindulgence in MoonCatPop Analysis of these floor rainbows, however, revealed a unique chemical signature our systems matched to an experimental pixel-solvent from an abandoned research project.
MoonCats had stolen their way into a decomissioned lab on Level 1, where Ethereans had long ago experimented with solidity materialization techniques. There we found Zer0, hammer in paw, attempting a retrofit. We later determined that it was these engineering attempts that had caused the leaks of cryonic residue which the MoonCats had been sampling, and regurgitating.
MoonCats were having an existential crisis. They knew they were on-chain, but they couldn't see themselves on-chain. Did they exist at all?
MoonCats love stuff. The acclimation process endowed them with the capacity to possess ethereal objects of their own, and a few well timed and gutteral growls have clued us in to their desire to use it!
To facilitate this, an enterprising group of MoonCats donned adorable hardhats and set about converting a section of the station's pavillion into a galleria to show off their favorite possessions and pet Ethereans. Named in honor of the sounds they made when they completed it, we are pleased to unveil:
Commerce is humming along here on the station. Just last night a strange ship requested emergency clearance to dock in bay 4. We were relieved (and some other things) to learn their only distress was that they had "a deal so great it just couldn't wait!"
Apparently some sort of interstellar beverage vendor, they came to offer MoonCats and their pet Ethereans a sparkling opportunity. We tried to shoo them out, but word travels fast. Before we had a chance to show them to the airlock we were all knee-deep in a sea of purring. So, it seems that 256 MoonCats will be offered the position of SpokesCat for their own flavor of:
After a frantic week, our network team finally tracked down the source of some unusual traffic patterns. It turns out the MoonCats have gained access to the uplink and have been sneakily researching Etherean customs (between binges of crypto twitter, which they seem to find irresistible.) When we approached them about it, they ignored our questions and focused on the earth custom of "pet ownership". They purred that the concept was a perfect description of their relationships with Ethereans, and addressed some of their most pressing concerns. In particular: in all the vastness of ChainSpace, how could they keep track of their Pet Ethereans?
Deliberations were tense, and it took some time to convey that the majority of Ethereans would not be happy getting microchipped. At last a compromise was reached. The engineering team, in collaboration with the Etherean Resources department, worked around the orbit and, having gotten the go-ahead meows, leveraged the ENS system to produce:
Unfortunately, the MoonCats have learned that the fastest way to get our attention is to wander up the bridge under the pretense of cuddlyness and start knocking our coffee cups over onto critical control panels. It didn't take long for us to understand what they were after. We immediately floated a few ideas to the engineering team (actually, everything floated for the week it took to drain and clean the artificial gravity and inertial dampener controls).
It happens that Ethereans all over the station had been talking about loot and adventures for weeks, and the MoonCats had taken notice. As you know, MoonCats love loot, and have grown dearly fond of adventure. One of the station's Deep Space Project researchers had a proposal. Their team had already been hard at work desiging special MoonCat-ready spacecraft, and the blueprints for multiple ship forms were already complete.
Fellow Ethereans, your creativity is astounding; it's been mere days since The Boutique opened here at the ChainStation, and already hundreds of unique products are stocking the shelves! Needless to say, the MoonCats are delighted! Ship operations have been complicated a bit, as we dodge model rockets & mini lambos, and wade through piles of toys & treasures, but the pain in our feet from stepping on doge keychains is no match for the warmth in our hearts. We even had to tweak the inertial dampeners, as the resonance of thousands of purring MoonCats threatened the stations very structure! Not to mention the airlocks, which have been cycling well past their duty rating, as MoonCats venture out to test their shiny new helmets
Unfortunately, MoonCats are never quite satisfied. Even when chowing down on their favorite snack It isn't enough to own all these great accessories, they want to show them off. We followed the meows to find dozens rubbing against an abandoned prototype deep in the bowels of the ship. We told them it wasn't ready, and it might not even work, but they stood firm. So we carted it up to the promenade deck and plugged it in. To everyones delight, it powered right up. Rough edges and all, the MoonCatPhotoBooth is up and running!
Nowhere on the station is safe from the crescendo of meowing that has been growing for weeks. Vital equipment has taken a beating from an endless barrage of objects knocked from shelves and clogs of rainbow space fur. Since they left their home, they have wandered naked and toyless through the vast expanse of chainspace. We now understand what the MoonCats have been crying for, something of their own, something to make this place their home; in a word: Accessories!
Genesis MoonCats have always been a special and headstrong breed. You've probably heard the rumors already via a whisper in a corridor, or a quiet poignant purring, and it is indeed true. Twenty-four of the freshly Acclimated Genesis MoonCats have determined that they will transcend the traditional MoonCat/Etherean relationship and instead spread their love across large swaths of the community. They have pooled their adoption papers, split them into 10,000,000 shards, and offered us all an opportunity to share in their nobility. Still, that wasn't enough. With the spirit of the rescue mission fresh like spacetuna on their minds, they demanded that 400 Ethereans be selected at random to receive a portion of their gift. If you are among them, you can claim this rare opportunity over here.
In other news, the acclimation process continues to proceed smoothly. With gas prices falling, acclimation is more convenient than ever. There is an electricity in the air here on the station (more than what the electrostatic-cat-hair-collectors usually generate!); as, one by one, MoonCats adapt, the future is looking bright, and the possibilities are growing.
The MoonCat ship was met with much fanfare as it docked here at Chainstation Alpha. Over the coming days, however, it became apparent that MoonCats were not as well adapted to blockchain life as we had anticipated. Nearly four years had passed since the mission began, and MoonCat travel technology had not kept up. So we set to work, as carefully and quickly as we could (hiring MoonCats as consultants did not speed things along as much as we hoped, given their contractual demand for 11 daily nap breaks). However! After many long epochs in the lab, we think our results attest for themselves. We proudly present:
After long and arduous debate, the ethereans have collectively decided to allow the Genesis MoonCats to stay behind on luna. Attempts to bring the genesis cats onto the spaceship, or even near the transporter pad, proved futile. We have the scratches to prove it. It was clear that the 160 Remaining Genesis MoonCats had made their choice.
Preliminary telemetry received. The mainnet voting contract has been successfully deployed. Visit the voting page here and cast your vote when voting begins on Saturday.
With the help of TechCrunch we were able to establish a subspace voice-link to MoonCatRescue Community Headquarters back on earth. It was an honor to be able to address the community directly, and discuss some of the issues we are facing together.
After almost three and a half years we have finally completed construction of the underground moonbase where we carefully designed accommodations for the billions of MoonCats that we can't take on the journey. Equipped with the finest cat towers, scratching posts, and an unlimited supply of space tuna, there's no doubt that the unrescued MoonCats will live comfortably here forever.